Dawn of Optimism

The Pandemic has spread its jaws tight in the second wave in India – attacking not only the physical health of the citizens but also affecting the mental fitness. 

Everyone out has lost someone either in the family or locality – which has just aired the fire of negativity. Deep inside all of us are craving for thoughts of affirmations, for positivity, for an ounce of hope towards better tomorrow! I couldn’t be luckier in choosing “Viktor Frankl’s” Man’s search for meaning randomly to get this little bit of “hope”

The author being a Nazi Concentration camp survivor has beautifully explained the psychological state of humans in every phases of life – through the ups and downs. Jotting down a few of them which actually threw light on the optimistic sight in me. (Hope it serves you right)

  • One instance which an author recalls in a talk where he was shown the pictures of prisoners laying like the haystacks in a room on their sick days – prisoners suffering from the typhus epidemic wearing old rags as clothes resting their wounds on torn shoes – some bleeding and others searching for piece of bread in their torn pockets – the person showing the pictures to the author tried having pity on the conditions in which they survived on which the author’s reaction was surprising when he said that these were the happiest times as we could rest, we could laze and not go out and work. So you see it is all about the perception – every thing can have two perspectives – you need to find the happier one, the positive one.
  • Another instance where he focuses on how the prisoners though in misery still had the humanity to think for the other one in the group.
  • Hope – was a huge thing that the prisoners of camp were motivated for survival of every day that passed. The times when they were taken from one camp to another rose their hopes to live a better life with lesser pain. The “hope” that one day they will be free helped them survive through the most brutal tortures. (every camp always had an option for prisoners to suicide by touching the electric wire but they still chose to live each day in dreams of freedom)
  • This is an extract from the book “I would like to mention a few similar surprises on how much we could endure: we were unable to clean our teeth, and yet, in spite of that and a severe vitamin deficiency, we had healthier gums than ever before. We had to wear the same shirts for half a year, until they had lost all appearance of being shirts. For days we were unable to wash, even partially, because of frozen water-pipes, and yet the sores and abrasions on hands which were dirty from work in the soil did not suppurate (that is, unless there was frostbite). Or for instance, a light sleeper, who used to be disturbed by the slightest noise in the next room, now found himself lying pressed against a comrade who snored loudly a few inches from his ear and yet slept quite soundly through the noise”

All I wanna point out through this blog is – The pandemic has 100s of negative effects but then it is we who are gonna pull ourselves out from this negativity. We can and have to stand up for our families, our friends, our colleagues!! It is gonna be tough each day to stand the scenes of people struggling for oxygen, relatives queing up to bury their near ones but then let us stand tougher against all this. Material help is provided to the country from every corner of the globe, but mental support has to be given by us – you need not have huge bank balance, all you need is a positive mind. If you only can pull your close circle from sinking into dark thoughts – you have done your part of the job! In no time the chain of smiles and hopes for healthier tomorrow will spread. 

We are comparatively in a better situation then the people who have survived the world wars, the concentration camps, the Vietnam War and our very own Indian freedom struggle. Back then it was physical torture which is beyond our imagination. Today all we have to do is simple things – wear a mask, avoid gatherings, stay home. We have Netflix, we have thousands of books online which are unread, we have our families with us unlike the wars where families were parted and all what people had was closed gas chambers to threaten them with their death.

Spread the word – stay home, stay safe and stay positive! Very soon there will be a new dawn of health and happiness!

Failures – Part and Parcel of life

You will fail, you will fall

But never forget to rise over this all

You will stumble, you will feel lost

But remaining there will have a huge cost

You can pull yourself from dust to stars

You are the one who can flaunt your scars

Everyone fails – some openly and some in secret

All you need to remind is – make yourself sweat

Sweat a little more in your dream’s desire

Burn yourself a little more in that burning fire

You will be through all of it!

Success isn’t just about achieving things rightly – but it is also about the journey you went through! You will always cherish those achievements which were more of a challenge rather than the ones which came placed in your plate! To the ones with huge dreams – hard work isn’t an issue – but sometimes all you need is a little push to grow better, to think healthy and to get up and press the restart button!

Readers Attention

They say a reader can live thousand lives before he dies! They reading gives you unending happiness! People say what exercise is to body – reading is to mind! And the never ending list of why and how reading helps one to just be better version of self!

So here we are starting this drive to read and read and read!

It is like we challenge ourselves to read 2 books a month. You can do it silently and take a note of your own reading or you can use social media to inspire people around to read by telling about the good books you have read.

Tag your friends or join the whatsapp group made where readers across the city, state, country and may be even globe share the experiences they had while reading the books they have picked.

Feel free to mail for further details on letsendthestigma1@gmail.com

Rat Race

Man eats Man! Does he? Maybe YES! The way the markets compete so competitively it does. You don’t do a task up to the mark and gone, you are no more in the good books of your company. Your promotion sometimes gets a pause due to your own deficiency and at times due to fault in our stars (Just meant you’re not so good luck). Let’s just jot down what are the reasons to stress at your workplace:

1. Different views on the same issue: Might so happen that in a team there are varied solutions on the same issue and your view is that your proposal is the best and there arises conflicts! Can we deal with it in a decent manner – Of course Yes. Let it be mutual decision, let it include the best points of all the ideas so that everyone is included

2. No credits given – Often it happens, that the project you worked on, the success you burnt the midnight oil for is all gone to someone else. And this is an obvious reason to feel lost because it so happens that when you work your heart out for some project you get attached to it, it is like your own baby which you started from the scratch and taken to heights. Though the solutions to this are better while reading but implementation happens to be difficult, we can try resolving things always – you can sit and explain things to your seniors

3. Early promotions of juniors – Okay, this is more of a human behaviour that you naturally have a feeling of superiority when you have been engaged for a longer time with an institute. Just sit back and think calmly – were you really up to the mark, I would like to highlight and say compare your productivity with what you feel you can do and not with someone else. Maybe you were expected to give better results because you had the potential.

Well, you know the problems are just never ending, it is like the more I jot down the more the list increases. You know your own problems much better than anyone else sitting back and just doing the guess work for you. All I wanna just suggest is – you can try this method of resolving your issues – take a place in the corner of your room, or just sit back on the terrace with a pen and blank paper. Divide the paper in 2 halves roughly and write down what you can do and mark yourself out of 10. Like just a self-evaluation of whether you really are giving your 100%

Try this one and I am sure you will have a better picture of what you can do and where you are lagging! You can use that pen-paper technique in many things – just change your headings and use it!!

Do write back about is this helping you in the comments section or ping me or just drop mail on letsendthestigma1@gmail.com. I would be glad to hear from you.

Explore Life – don’t have stereotypes

Before reading this one – I just want all of you to close your eyes and just imagine what is your definition of having a perfect life! Ah! I really want you to do that (in fact if you could spare a little extra time just get a pen and paper and roughly jot down what are your few to ideas of your kind off perfect life, a perfect day etc)

How many of you thought of it like – a lavish house, a car, good job and stuff like so. If you must have done this – Congrats! You are very much normal – because that’s the way we have brought up our mind to think! But then this is routine right!? Can we think apart from this – let us try!

Can the definition of PERFECT – not be the labels from the past and be something new and original! Something like – Happy you, sitting back in your garden, enjoying the morning sunlight and treating your eyes with the glimpses of butterflies playing with brightly coloured flowers! Or something like this – which is more soothing to your heart and not only to your pockets. I know many of you must be like – this just sounds good in books but real life needs materialistic things, and I totally agree as well! But all I wanna say is – can those worldly desires be side lined and the other goals which don’t sound to be that conventional be mainstream!

Like why have we just accepted the western culture in terms of their dressings and parties! Why not the other things – Here we have defined age for everything education till 22-24, then marry by 25, then kids before 30s (or else there are unimaginable questions raised) and house, then educate kids(till that time we are already reaching heights of exertion – mentally and physically), then their life is our life (daadi-dada and Naani Nana)! Western Countries do not have a defined age for education – they have enrolments in universities even in their 30s and 40s. They start new ventures even in their late 40s.

Can we just explore our limits of what we can do and all our capabilities! Try it out – take up a weekly challenge that you think of something new every week – the same old thing which you did in a specific manner from years – try doing it differently. You will be happy of creating new things – be it as small as just arranging your study table or normally you cut vegetables long now dice it in small cubes – do things differently. (even psychology, says that this keeps your brain active)

Try out new things and do write back about it in the comments section or just drop mail onletsendthestigma1@gmail.com. I would be glad to hear from you.

Don’t be careful!

Reading the title, you guys must be like – Esha, are you fine! What are you talking about – DON’T BE CAREFUL! I really repeat don’t be too careful, don’t try to be too perfect at every task you take up. Planning every phase is okay but not hard-core plans where even an inch of unexpected blasts and Boom!! You get shattered – like oh god! What next! Let there be some innocence left, let there be surprises which life plans for you! If you are too organized those surprises come more like shocks because that wasn’t that you had planned in black and blue.

Prepare well for every upcoming challenge but it is really fine if situations turn your efforts down, maybe there was something better for you. It’s your life not a coded machine where the sequence can be drafted by you. Let things happen. It will be more magical and life will have spice in it!

Do write back about is this helping you in the comments section or just drop mail on letsendthestigma1@gmail.com. I would be glad to hear from you.

End the Stigma

Sushant Singh Rajput!! A name in the industry which had no GODFATHER! He made his own place and he made his own name! It was something like HE CAME, HE SAW, HE CONQUERED (OUR HEARTS)!!

And then out of nowhere, a Sunday afternoon comes up a pop up! Sushant Singh Rajput hangs himself at his Bandra residence! He had money – so there were no financial crunches which means money was not an issue, he had fame – that too wasn’t the concern, people loved him – that too didn’t bother! What mattered was – in spite of all of the riches he was unfit – NOT PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY! A topic much ignored and overrated to be fools thing to talk over this! How many of you face stress and are ashamed to accept that yes you need help! Come on Yaar!! We are humans not machines!

The difference in us and robots is just that we can feel things! Can we be a little sensitive when we open our mouth to criticise others and can we be a little open to accept that yes!! We do face mental stress!! And it is OKAY to say that you can not take it anymore! That doesn’t make you a weak or coward human! Accepting your flaws is the art to live happy – let’s do that!!

Here is an open help to all of you there who are struggling to speak to someone! You won’t be judged because there will be no direct communication! You won’t be criticised because here you will be talking to just a better version of yourself! You can feel free to simply drop your problems and issues on this Mail ID – letsendthestigma1@gmail.com!  

We will be speaking over this in the upcoming few blogs! Stay connected and share your problems!

Its better to talk to some one and solve each other’s problems rather than simple crying on funeral and wishing that you could be a help! ACT WISELY! ACT NOW!

Communication

This question peeped through my mind all the while throughout the day as I was sitting on the first bench of my Orientation Programme before starting my articleship days “As to why this 35 hours are a necessity when all you do here is just speak, chatter all round and nothing else?”

The question hovered me even on the last day and I wondered when will it be answered. And yes! It was answered rightly on the very first day of my articleship (where I was interviewed before, which as well included communication skills – because the interviewers didn’t scrutinize my results deeply, all they were interested is the way I present myself). It was my first day of articleship where I was accompanied by my senior and colleagues, and I was handed over a file to compare the TDS as per books, TDS certificates along with form 26AS. I was blank because all this was read in books but I never knew how to download 26AS, neither was I thorough with the accounting software. I kept staring at the files for a while with an awkward look till my senior came and with the bossy voice instructed me – “If you aren’t aware of things, ask for help and start working immediately!!” And then, I understood why was OP conducted, those 35 hours did work miracles and I could get through things.

Basically, not only on the office desk but at every platform communication plays crucial role. Giving you an example how effective communication helps you to make the listeners visualize better and in turn it makes the process of understanding the facts better. Let us just compare – and ask yourself which sounds better and conveys better.
1st way – I started my morning with coffee
2nd way – I opened the chilly winter morning by treating myself with a steaming hot aromatic coffee.

I am sure the second way makes you feel the situation right. Same happens in our teams while working, if we can convey the ideas well, we can convince well and gradually that affects our career growth. There are many ways through which we can be effective communicators like effective listening, reading of facts and having knowledgeable content to share in the right manner with the RIGHT TONE (very important when you are in a verbal conversation)
Simple way to start can be add minute details to your observation and these will be automatically added to your words.

Speak sensible and Spread your ideas.

Self Analysis

I was confused! I was self-analyzing my own steps and thoughts and decisions taken in the past! Was it because of the isolation in lock-down or was is it a result of a deep conversation!? Well the process was memorable to start from the pen and paper jotting down things and thinking over each of the word given as an advice to now where I could find path which can be walked well!

Writing down a few maybe it helps you as well!

  1. Every age has some rights and some obligations! – A deep line which if given a thought can cut your thinking and corresponding actions as sharp as sword the sword. When a student you have the right to ask for academic help but then you also have an obligation to produce results. In childhood if you have a right to be free of tensions and burdens you have an obligation to keep that childishness alive in you! You cannot skip the bar and mix two ages’ rights and obligations – because that’s the time where you create heavy blunders for your own future.

 

  1. Compromise is a compromise till you make it feel the same – If you think on the dilemmas or issues having solutions contradicting your wishes in a way to accept it whole heartedly with a mutual agreement it isn’t a compromise, instead it will be a promise to yourself to stay happy with decisions taken in self-interest!

 

  1. Thinking Substance over form – A language used probably in law has got a lot of relevance in real life as well! One cannot think about every scenario in a bookish manner. Like, if one thing is ideal in a specific way, it need not be the same in every circumstance, because the definition of ideal in every situation varies! Think more in substance then the formats.

 

  1. You cannot stay happy at cost of others cries –Though I always firmly believed in this, but it was highlighted again. Happiness is something that spreads, and how can you smile when the reason behind the smiles is a thousand tears and bad vibes. Rather it must be rule – that one should not build his own life, ruining 10 other people’s smiles. (I guess, Karma works here better)

 

  1. You cannot question your Parents! –The ones who walked with your small steps and held your fingers to make a better life at the cost of every sacrifice that was demanded by time – they cannot be wrong! Under them every problem finds its own solution. Rude at times but they are the only ones who will think for your benefit even if it takes a huge toll on them!

 

Stay Active, Stay Focused!!

I was just lazing on the sofa waiting for mom to get me the evening coffee after cancelling the plan of me making coffee for everyone just because I had to get up and walk all the way through hall and pull things down to make coffee and get it for all. In short, I was lazily just turning myself in every way possible to fit in on the sofa with all soft toys. The steaming hot tea cup finally managed to blow off the chilled attitude of mine and I switched the TV to get some updates on the pandemic. And while random switching I came across this interesting news, rather a short snap story of couple in drought prone region of Maharashtra, this couple who may be stood in their early 40s, managed to dig a well 25 feet deep without any heavy machinery. They started from the day; the Prime Minister announced the nation to be locked down. And within less than a month they dug this well which now not only had enough water for this family but also enough water to feed their cattle and neighbours.

And I just got a “KICK”, like these people whom we so called refer as villagers or the less learned people have utilized their time much more effectively then we as civilized and extra learned people do. I just took a quick look back to what we do here in cities since the lock down was announced! And realized – the students who had their exams find reasons like the atmosphere is too negative and we cant focus on our studies, the newly qualified who are yet to find jobs have seen enough series on Netflix and Amazon, scrolling whatsapp, posting old pics on Instagram with captions like “Life before lockdown” and the way we have wasted our 20-25 days is just pathetic. Listening to the story of this couple I actually got charged like – Bro, if these people can make their way through difficulties we too can. Yes the lock down has affected us mentally but then we can be our own motivators rightly!!

Let us take charge of our own selves! Every effort in right direction is going to be a task towards betterment of the economy which will help our global family to get out of the crisis. Stay home and be creative. Every one surely will have something in addition. Stay focused Stay Home and Stay active.

close up photo of black ceramic mug
Photo by Olenka Sergienko on Pexels.com